Don’t Let Temporary Emotions Make Decisions for Us

Most people have an ocean within them that can become turbulent at any moment. When we are happy, everything seems possible. But when we are disappointed, it can suddenly feel as though there is no way forward. When people feel wronged, they often want an explanation. When they are provoked, they may easily react immediately without thinking things through. Impulse is the devil, and emotions are often the greatest enemy of good decision-making. Some mistakes in life are not caused by a lack of ability, but by making the wrong decision at the worst possible moment. 

For example, they may quit a job, end a relationship, cut ties with a friend, or even change their original plans because of a moment of emotion. At that moment, they often believe that this is what they truly want. But once your emotions gradually settle and you look back, you may realise that at that moment, you were actually a slave to your emotions. Many people may then ask themselves: “Did I really want to do that?

There is nothing wrong with having emotions. We all feel angry, disappointed, or afraid of losing something. These are all natural human reactions. What we really need to learn is not how to become emotionless, but how to pause when emotions arise, take a deep breath, and avoid acting too quickly. This is especially important in the workplace and in business. They should shift their perspective, stepping away from being slaves to their emotions and becoming observers before making a decision. Emotional intelligence can sometimes be more powerful than intellectual intelligence.

Confucius once said, “A lack of patience in small matters can disrupt great plans.” This reminds us to look at the bigger picture and keep temporary emotions under control in order to achieve greater things. The workplace does not operate according to personal feelings alone. A project requires the cooperation of many people, a company relies on different departments working together, and a single decision may affect the interests of clients, colleagues, employees, and even the company itself. Therefore, just because something makes us feel uncomfortable does not mean that it has to be resolved in our own way. This does not mean that personal feelings are unimportant. Rather, once people enter the workplace, they gradually need to understand that many work-related issues cannot be judged by emotions alone. They must also consider responsibilities, interests, and outcomes. Mature professionals often need something more. They need judgement that goes beyond emotions and the ability to consider matters from different perspectives.

Mature professionals gradually come to understand that not everything that makes them uncomfortable requires an immediate reaction, and not every difference of opinion means that others are disrespecting them. Sometimes, the other person is simply expressing a different point of view, or the problem they have pointed out may indeed exist. What truly needs to be addressed is not who made me uncomfortable, but how the issue itself should be resolved. This is, in fact, an important change that takes place as a person gradually becomes more mature. As Festinger’s principle suggests, 10% of life is made up of what happens to you, while the other 90% is determined by how you respond to it. People who are less accomplished often place too much emphasis on “me”, and they are often the ones who end up getting hurt.

When people are young, they tend to see things from the perspective of their own feelings. For example, “What he said made me feel hurt.” “I feel that my boss is treating me unfairly.” “This company makes me unhappy.” These feelings are real, and they deserve to be acknowledged. But after entering the working world, people gradually realise that although their feelings are real, those feelings do not represent the whole picture. Beyond feelings, people also need to look at the facts, responsibilities, interests, and ultimately, the outcome. More often than not, decisions made on impulse turn out to be wrong.

Young people today live in a very different era from the past. Many have not experienced the material hardship and pressures of life that the previous generation went through. This is one of the changes brought about by social development. This has also made many young people today less mature and more likely to make decisions based on their emotions. A truly mature person should learn to take responsibility for the consequences of their own choices. People who are well-liked often tend to have a mature way of thinking.

Therefore, one of the signs of true maturity is developing an awareness of consequences. Before making a decision, instead of simply asking, “Do I want to do this?”, they begin to ask, “What happens after I do this?” This may seem like a simple question, but it can stop many impulsive actions before they happen. Sometimes, those few seconds can make all the difference between rational thinking and impulsive action. Many times, it is not that people do not know what is right. It is simply that when emotions take over, they are unwilling to think one step further. Of course, maturity does not mean that we will never get angry again, nor does it mean that we must always remain calm when we are treated unfairly. It simply means gradually learning that I can have emotions without necessarily acting on them and learning to “delay my response.” Staying calm is a form of inner strength, and also the beginning of civility.

The decisions we make in life should not be driven by emotions. Only by keeping our emotions under control can we make decisions that are in our best interests in the midst of a storm. Of course, we cannot guarantee that every choice we make will be the right one, but important decisions are always worth waiting before we make them. Wait for the emotions to subside, then look at the situation again. Give yourself time to calm down, think through the consequences, and only then decide what your next step should be. Because many times, the person we need to overcome is not someone else, but the part of ourselves that, in a moment of impulse, wants to make a decision on behalf of our future self. Give your emotions some time and give yourself some room to reconsider.

In politics and war, some leaders may choose to start wars out of personal interests or momentary impulse, or make decisions that bring no real benefit. In the end, it is often the people who suffer. Impulsiveness is often a form of evil, while remaining calm is the most basic attitude one should have.

Translated from original article source:

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